"Arabian Nights"
Part 17
by Liz
I'm not used to this, Sean thought with a sigh as he paced Karl's quarters. I'm going to wear a rut in the floor before the night is over... but I must keep the memories, the dreams, at bay...
Keeping a born soldier and warrior locked up was not the best of ideas. And having said soldier's liege lord and best friend within view of the main window in Karl's rooms was even worse. Stopping abruptly at the arched portal, Sean's heart sank even as his blood boiled at spying Viggo leading a gorgeous young creature down the open-air hall to what was most certainly his quarters. He had a sudden, jolting image in his mind of the young man on his knees, sucking hungrily at Viggo's rigid cock. But just as quickly, the overwhelming shiver of lust Sean felt was replaced with anger and sorrow, and he closed his eyes and sighed heavily. Viggo hasn't even come looking for me, has not sought me out, he mused. Why did I even try to find him in the first place if it's obvious he doesn't care? Why SHOULD he want me, as tainted and used as I am...?
He didn't even hear Karl come up behind him, he was so absorbed in his thoughts. Sean's entire body suddenly tensed to spring, every nerve twanging like an overwrought bowstring, and he waited in abject fear for the moment when Karl would take what little control was left to him; punching him back, holding him down, forcing, taking, just like... Air left his lungs as the memories returned... his breath held and he shook like a cornered cat. I am not broken, I am not broken, I am NOT -
"Why Prince Viggo would give up a beauty such as yourself is beyond reasoning," whispered the Captain with undisguised wonder. His breath tickled softly at Sean's ear, and Sean wanted to scream and rail with the conflict of emotions assaulting his senses. He owns me, I'm his slave, and he'll be just like the others, he thought. But I also want him. This isn't right. What have I done to deserve this?
"Do not... Please..." A soldier, reduced to pleading. How disgusting, Sean chastised himself. But the rage he'd experienced earlier was now absent for some reason, and now Sean was worried he HAD been finally broken. Tears stung his eyes as Karl read his mind.
"Quite a change from the maddened warrior," Karl stated, gripping Sean's shoulders and turning the blonde to face him. The lush green eyes he'd hoped to gaze into were shadowed and downcast, defeat and desolation like a shroud over Sean's hunched body. Alarm gripped Karl and he blurted, "Sean, what's wrong?"
The ridiculous question caused Sean to first gape in amazement... then laugh. Laugh as if he could rid himself of the humiliation. Laugh as if he could finally cry when it was all over. "What's WRONG?!" he crowed, tears streaming down his flushed face. "What's WRONG?! If you must ask me, then you have no right to know!" Sean abruptly felt a surge of strength and anger that mindlessly drove his hands upward to push at Karl's chest, knocking the Captain backwards in a stumble. "I allowed myself - my body - to be used in ways that a soldier should kill himself over, Captain," Sean spat. Every muscle began twitching again, but this time the blond made no attempt to conceal it. Taken aback, Karl could merely stand alertly and watch, hoping Sean would not attack; something was very wrong, and Karl now had no wish to fight back the soldier while he was in this confusing condition. "I was - am - merely property, all I am now doomed to be. Kill me, Captain... Karl. Do me a warrior's honor and kill me!"
All Karl saw were fiery green eyes before he realized Sean had lunged for him, as swift as a cobra's strike. Iron fists dug into the robes at his chest, and Karl let himself be pulled to Sean's wild, haunted face. Hot, jagged breaths burst upon the Captain's skin from Sean's flaring nostrils, but the man said nothing more as he stared at Karl like a bull awaiting the impetus to charge. "Sean...?" Karl whispered tentatively, fighting the urge to grip Sean's fists with his own. "Sean, speak to me..."
"Kill me, Karl," Sean urgently whispered back. "Kill me. Kill me!"
By Allah, Karl swore to himself. His arms moved of their own volition to Sean's now stiff shoulders, to hug the blond, to hold him close. He could think of nothing else to do for the man who begged for death, begged for it at his hands.
Sean's desperate hopes soared when Karl moved into his grasp. He will do it, he thought in overwhelming happiness and relief, thank Odin he will - "NO!" The bellowing scream raged up and out of him when he realized that the Captain meant no such thing, and he struck out blindly with a half-closed fist even as he tore himself from Karl to reel back and hit the wall. Away from me, get away, away, away...
"SEAN!"
The sharp bark from Karl snapped Sean back, and he looked at Karl through blurry eyes. A bloody stain smeared the dark-haired Captain's right cheekbone, where ragged fingernails had met tender skin, but Karl seemed to not notice. Instead, he stared back with a determined, perplexed look, as if he were trying to decide how to handle Sean. I know how I'd handle me, Sean decided; I'd either give the same right back to me, or -
A quick feint with his left fist at Karl's head enabled Sean to dart in with his right and steal the only freedom Sean could think of: the Captain's mirrored silver dagger. "If you will not do it for me, I will do it myself!"
Karl caught the blond's furiously mumbled words amidst the flurry of movement, and spied the glint of silver in Sean's hand. The man is outright mad, he realized with fear, and without thinking twice he backhanded Sean with all the force he could muster. The dagger sailed from jarred fingertips to skitter across the floor tiles as Sean slid down the rough wall to sit in a sobbing heap. His face throbbed, but the pain was nothing compared to the knowledge that he would live after all. "Do what you will, I care not," Sean coughed out from between swollen lips. If this is my destiny, my fate, then so be it, came the numbing thought while Karl knelt before him; my body is not my own anymore... take my spirit as well...
"I will do nothing, Sean," Karl said softly, careful not to touch or reach out. "Trust me."
"No."
What would bring a fine, brave soldier of war to his knees like this? The question circled Karl's mind incessantly as he also pondered Sean's pitiful, moaning response. He knew Sean had suffered before coming to the Caliph's palace, but he was worried about the sudden change in the blond's demeanor. Can I get him to talk of it, to purge himself? "Sean. Please. Tell me what happened to you." He wanted to help the man, but how exactly? And would Sean even let him? He didn't even trust him. Actually, why should he?
"Please, I can't stay in this room any longer. It makes me think, gives me time to remember..." Sean hugged himself and shivered, tears burning on his cheeks. "I'm dirty. Dirty..."
// "You WILL submit, slave! You're pretty, and I need a good fuck!"
Rope, rough and splintery, sawing into my neck, tugged on by my master... Freezing iron binding my hands behind me... Floor against my cheek, heavy foot on the small of my back, another on my aching shoulders and I cannot struggle, have no control. The guard I had made friends with now holds me in place. The rope burns into my skin, and I focus. Focus on pain. Focus on the end of it. Focus anywhere but here.
"Finest ass I've ever seen. Firm and tight. I'll enjoy this..."
The sting from the lash of the whip on my back nearly obscures the agony... the ripping of my flesh... I cannot stop him... No control... //
"Sean, you had a bath earlier," Karl stated stupidly, his brows knitting even as he said it. But his mouth plowed on while his brain knew that Sean's previous masters had hurt him so in ways he couldn't imagine, didn't want to imagine. "I can call for Liv and have - "
"I AM DIRTY!" The fury in Sean's voice was there, but his body had no strength left now to show it. He dropped his head to his arms, hiding his face from Karl's view. Too long to think, his mind fuzzily told him. If you think, if you remember, you will become a shadow of yourself... "Leave me, please. Leave me," Sean muttered into the crook of his arm. Don't you understand, Captain, don't you see...?
Karl was torn. He wasn't sure if it was the madness talking, or if Sean really did want to be alone. Pity, he felt such pity for the strong, exotic beauty now reduced to a weak, struggling man; and yet, would Sean become even more incensed if his wishes were ignored? "As you wish, Sean." The Captain could say nothing more as he stood, took one final look at his heart's desire, and walked into the adjoining room. If I turn back to look again, Karl thought painfully, I might damage him more... and myself...
In leaving, Karl didn't hear the despondent plea whispering up from the lips of Sean, lips that were trembling as it was said.
"Please don't leave me..."
If you enjoyed this story, please send feedback to: Liz
go to PART 18